When I first started watching this I was like.. SO thats why my life is rough! People keep praying for me! lol! Stop it! haha jk. You have to watch the video to get that. I never realized how prayer works but I have seen it work in people but how she explains it makes so much sense. The reason I know is because the harder my mom would pray for me to more difficult my life seemed to become but then when I realized what I needed to changed and got my focus back then life made sense. Prayer is very powerful. In this she talks about how when you pray for someone it is frustrating because you love these people and for some reason it is like their behavior gets worse rather than better. It is all because of when a person gets in trouble and has to deal with punishment. Not saying God punishes per-say but he starts showing you how your actions are destructive once people pray for you and that channel of prayer is communicated. I can see why so many people give up on praying for people bt this is when God is just getting starting and working on them. You can never give up and think that it is a waste of time. You have no idea how God is working sometimes.
As an example.. Just a random show I was watching the other day… A teenage girl lost her mother tragically and all she saw was her father burying himself in his work and not shedding a tear. She looked at him and despised him and told him she was so disappointed because her mother deserved to be mourned for and he never took a day off to mourn and that her mother deserved better. Later in the show she bumps into a friend who spends most of her evenings out very late and lived across from a Park. She said she sees her dad there most nights or extremely early in the morning weeping with a book in his hand. The Girl then asked if it was a specific book and she said yes. The daughter then teared up and said that is the park where he and my mom met and their first talk when they met was over that book. She immediately left and realized her dad just did not want her to see him upset for afraid it would make it hard for the daughter to move on. Whether it was right or wrong is beside the point. The point is, she had no idea that she was completely wrong about her father and that he was going and mourning in his way. She assumed that since she did not see it herself that nothing was happening.
How many times are we like this? I am like this all the time. I am so fixated on “Seeing is Believing” when in reality we have no idea how God is really working on a person. This is why we should never give up on praying for people we love or want to love more. It is not our duty to judge and decide how and when God Works in somebody else’s life. I just know I need to tell myself this way more often and not give up and to have more faith in the prayers not only for others but the ones for myself as well.
The other day I was having one of those days where you felt stuck in the house, busy with work, homework, being a mom, playing with your toddler, and pretty much going crazy in a 900 square foot apartment! The weather has been cold, the warm, then a blizzard would come and clear out and leave a beautiful muddy walkway. Mother Nature in the Midwest at her finest for sure.
I kept trying to decide if I wanted to make dinner that Saturday night or splurge on a Steak from the steak house and even let Sophie have non-organic food! Yes, that is a big deal in this house. Ridiculous at times I am sure but hey, it’s my thing so get over it haha.
So, I went for it. Curb side pick-up and I was getting a filet and got Sophie mini plain burgers. I don’t know why but I was just so excited to get that and take it home like I had accomplished something amazing other than laundry. However, I had to unload quite a bit of stuff out of the car when we got back. I had to hold Sophie, my purse, her diaper bag, a box of diapers I had bought earlier that week, and then the sack full of our delicious food, and then a free hand to grab my to-go coke.
I had everything on my shoulder or in my hand and Soph on my hip. Carrying a lot is a usual thing for me since my apartment is upstairs. We get going and walking and it happened, it really happened! I heard a slow ripping of the paper sack and the bag busted! The food not only fell on the ground but hit just right on the ground to where it popped out of the containers! OH I WANTED to just cry but I just looked at it in the dark, like oh dear me now what.
As I put the other stuff down and see what I can salvage, my daughter is screaming “oh no, oh no mommy, u tubble huh?” “Yes, Mommy in trouble now.” I put Soph down and go to start picking things up as I hear, “Yay Pi-nic!” No No No!! I am screaming! I look over and she is sitting in the grassy mud and eating!! “Mmm mommy fin-ch fies, tank ooo tank ooo!!” Before I could say anything else I just let her enjoy herself because she has no idea and thinks everything is ok and the food is fine lol..
I throw the clean, organic mommy card out the window and just say,”Ok baby lets take the picnic inside since it’s dark and clean up the food and put it in the bag ok? “Ok mommy, keen up, keen up, yay!” She gets so excited cleaning up and feeling accomplished and I was not about to let my thoughts hinder that.. even though I wanted to cry and throw all the food away and say forget it! But there is that moment where you stop and realize what joy you might be taking away from your child when you do that. She has a lifetime to learn not to eat off the ground so today will not be the day that we learn it.
We make it up stairs and I get plates out and put them on the kitchen floor and put the ripped bag and containers and food pieces on the floor and divide it all up. I couldn’t believe I was doing this but I washed my steak off in the sink and got the grass off and put her fries on her plate and said “take these green things off because it’s grass and we don’t want to eat grass ok?” “K, no gass, Yay my do it!!” I told her good job as I just shook my head lol.. I picked my own grass off and luckily the mashed potatoes stayed together and her fries were decent.
So there we set, 8:45 at night having a picnic on the kitchen floor with Chicken, Fries, Potatoes, Rolls, and Steak fresh off the ground and into our bellies. The excitement and joy on her face made me realize that I almost killed that happy feeling by getting upset and throwing it all away. That whole moment could have been gone in an instant and we both would have gone to bed sad and upset. Instead we laughed and played and ate like nothing was wrong and when she helped me cleanup she looked over and gave me a hug and said “wuvvvv oooo and wuvvvv finch fies! (with a giggle)”
Now when things don’t go perfectly I try to be cautious of my emotions and not act like something is wrong and go with the flow in front of my toddler. She is so impressionable and I know how many times joy has been taken from me because I have allowed it or someone else assisted and I just want to see that face happy. When your child is happy and joyful it just changes your whole insides to where your stomach melts and drops like the first drop from a roller coaster.
So, I guess you could say we laughed over the spilled beef and fries… a whole new meaning to our “Organic” lifestyle haha.